BPDRecovery.com: Forums

My name is David 55. I discovered the truth about my disorders last week, that it is most definitely bpd. 12 years trying to be bipolar, getting nowhere. Pills, mania meltdowns, suicide attempt, divorce (and reunion, 22 tumultuous years now). I would like to talk to men around my age, married or otherwise been through it. My wife is a huge trigger for me, a drinking alcoholic (I don't), major depresson with psych meds, and I just found out about a year long sexual affair. My world shattered, but in my desperation I found out about bpd which is explaining me to myself. The grief has been awful. I don't cry as hard or often (it's been a month since d-day). I don't want to seperate (39 years together since age 15). We raised 3 kids, lost a son at age 20, have 7 grandkids and I would gladly die for her right now. I have treated her horribly in my black phase, and I have recently done at again over the discovery of the affair. This bpd has thrown gallons of gasoline onto the fire over the years. I intend to embrace the good information I am gathering here.

Hi David,

Welcome....this is a good place, and I hope you can find some help. I'm not a man, but I think in the long run those of us with bpd, both men and women have so many similar thought patterns and behaviors that we can relate to each other.

Are you on any meds or in any kind of therapy? How was the truth "discovered", if I may ask.

dagwood

Hi David ...

I'm not a man either, but I was struck by the fact that you are age 55.

I am in my 50's, too ... and only just recently discovered that I, too, am BPD. After so many years of struggling with a 'hidden enemy' ... and suffering so many losses in life ... I am grateful today to finally know what has been 'wrong' with me all this years, so I can know (and do) what steps I must ... to get well.

Knowing what is wrong, and taking steps to be well, gives me hope for the future!



There are lots of caring folks here; I hope you will soon be able to make here the male friendship connections you are seeking.

Best wishes for your recovery!

Yeah, it was pretty creepy reading the DSM description of BPD for the first time.
It felt as if someone had been following me around, spying on me....

Thanks for the kind replies. I would welcome friends both male and female, as it is others' experience I hope to learn from.

Apologies, I am using an Android and one-fingering it. I will be getting a laptop soon and be more able to communicate. Not on mess or in therapy, but was both for bipolar for years. That was meds, not mess. This thing keeps changing my words.

Where do I find an active forum on where I should go from here? I feel lost.

David,

Season Passes and On the Border are both good places to post. Seems like that is where most of us go.