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Roo-D-Bear
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Post subject: very discouraged Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 6:24 pm |
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Joined: Mon Sep 24, 2007 6:00 pm Posts: 150
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I didn't have such a good session yesterday in therapy. My T seems to do all this mindfulness stuff and not processing and everything anymore. i got so fed up with him and told him to go screw mindfulness and that it was a waste of my time and money to do this everytime......It is not helping me all the time. sometimes yes but he's changed the way we do therapy and I hate it! so I told him I won't go to therapy on monday unless it changes. he said ok.
I have to admit that you all are losing me in threads here. everything sounds philosophical and I am not good at it. if my T says I have complex PTSD, I don't go and search it out to see what the label is or isn't. He's the professional that I am paying so whatever he puts on the paper is just a label.
i believe in inner child work too, Jody..........:O) just some of the threads were getting too technical for me. sorry I couldn't join in. I wanted to but you are all way over my head lately. :O)
I'm still here though............LOL.
Roo
_________________ Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake
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Denim Blue
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 8:15 pm |
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Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm Posts: 738 Location: Reality ~ It's a great place to visit but I wouldn't want to live there!
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I was actually under the false impression that CPTSD was an official diagnosis until I did some research and learned that it was never approved in any diagnostic manual. Your therapist would not be able to document CPTSD as a mental health diagnosis since it is not in the DSM. Now I am wondering why a therapist would tell someone they have something that is not in the DSM unless he is treating you for a different disorder that he does not want to disclose to you. There are therapists who don't want to tell someone if they have BPD so it is possible he is using terms he thinks you will be more comfortable with in order to avoid resistence or therapy interferring behavior.
Complex PTSD is a term that could be as useful as something like Codependency but it is not a true mental health disorder and your therapist must be putting something else in your chart if he is billing insurance. I suppose if you are not using insurance to pay for your appointments, a therapist could say whatever he wants as long as you are willing to pay the bill, though. I would just wonder about the person's training if he is using a term that doesn't exist in the DSM. I don't know how much trust I would have in someone who was not truthful with me about my diagnosis but then I am not a very trusting person in general.
According to my research, "inner child" work is under the realm of self-help and not therapy. I could find no professional endorsement of using "inner child" work in treating PTSD, although that does not mean there are not counselors who use it in their practice (mainly with people recovering from addictions who have a hard time being honest with themselves). It could be helpful for some people to do on their own if they feel it is helpful for them, much like Yoga or anything else. It appears that CBT is the recommended therapy for PTSD (assuming you meet the criteria for PTSD but your therapist is using the term CPTSD instead) so you may want to be sure your therapist is using the most appropriate therapeutic methods with you in order to get the most from your therapy.
I know that Mindfulness exercises are a part of DBT, which is a form of CBT, but I did not find it helpful either. It could be I did not like it because I was not very successful at it, though. It is good that you let your therapist know that it is not working for you and that he is willing to try something else. Honest communication is important in order to get the most from therapy.
_________________ The question of suicide: Keep it a question. It's not really an answer.
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jodyisme
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 8:16 pm |
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Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm Posts: 1800 Location: texas
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heya ((Roo)) if you will ask questions, i will be happy to try and answer them, as im sure will others here. im sorry, its so hard to put it in words what i feel about inner child work. please, ask away.  this has taken me over 4 years to learn, hon, i know its kinda deep and hard to verbalize at times.
_________________ "no one can walk on you unless you lay down first" -old saying-
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Harmonium
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 9:42 pm |
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Joined: Thu Aug 07, 2008 7:56 am Posts: 1465
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Hi Roo!
I consider mindfulness to be part of processing for me. It's okay that you don't. Do what works for you. I think it's good that you told your T how you feel and that your T agreed. I don't believe anything will help all the time, but some things help in different situations. For me, the more tools I can have, the better equipped I am to deal with different things as they come up in RL.
I agree with you too that labels are just that, labels. The reason I go out and search about them is to better understand the behaviour behind the label. If that's not your gig, so what? No one here (I don't think) is going to mind if you don't do this, just some like to. To each their own.
I would like to suggest that if you feel a thread is too philosophical maybe you could post just that? I know I would try to re-word what I say to better relate to you. I want everyone to feel comfortable posting in any thread they want and if I am doing something that denies them that, I would look at my own style and see if I could say the same thing another way.
Glad your still here... :D
_________________ Temet Nosce-- The Oracle "Pain is resistance to change." --Ida Rolf BRING IT ON!! -- personal mantra
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AquaLite15
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 2:01 am |
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Joined: Thu Feb 16, 2006 6:00 pm Posts: 861
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Roo-D-Bear wrote: I have to admit that you all are losing me in threads here. everything sounds philosophical and I am not good at it. if my T says I have complex PTSD, I don't go and search it out to see what the label is or isn't. He's the professional that I am paying so whatever he puts on the paper is just a label.
i believe in inner child work too, Jody..........:O) just some of the threads were getting too technical for me. sorry I couldn't join in. I wanted to but you are all way over my head lately. :O)
I'm still here though............LOL.
Roo Some people like to research and learn for themselves, others like to leave that in the hands of others. I find that the more knowledge I hold the more comfortable I feel. I value knowledge, so I would be the one searching it out.... I seek answers more than what someone, be it a professional or not, tells me. I want to figure out what's right for me, and just because someone is a professional, doesn't really mean they always know best what's right for me. Every thread isn't for everyone... Some people have been here for a long time, have done a lot of research and/or reading, and hold a lot more facts and knowledge than I do... if I can't hang in there, I do try to understand and learn something from them.
_________________ The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. ---Winston Churchill
It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow. -- Robert H. Goddard
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Denim Blue
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 3:37 am |
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Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm Posts: 738 Location: Reality ~ It's a great place to visit but I wouldn't want to live there!
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I took the issue of CPTSD to another thread so I can learn if there are others like yourself who were told they have a mental disorder that does not exist in the diagnostic manual. It will be interesting to know if other therapists are being dishonest with their clients in the same way.
I tend to believe that knowledge is power so it is important for me to know the truth. I am also a bit sensitive about being lied to since it comes down to an issue of trust. I have known someone (my foster mother's ex-boyfriend) who was a compulsive liar so I got a chance to see how he convinced himself that his own lies were true. Since he is a convicted serial rapist/murderer, he is now safe behind bars where his lies are not going to hurt anyone but himself anymore. I may be a bit more cautious than most people but it helps keep me safe.
Because it is important to me to speak the truth, I find research valuable for helping me sort out the truth. In fact, I am feeling kind of stupid right now for believing something without verifying the facts for myself first. I should have discovered the deception long ago rather than waiting until now to look something up, especially considering how easy it was to do. If the research-based threads are too confusing for you, it is okay to ask questions and perhaps someone might be able to explain the concepts to you in a way you can better understand. At the same time, I think you will find it valuable to learn as much as you can without relying on others, such as your therapist, to tell you what to believe.
In the past I have tried to avoid confrontation when people were misinformed because I figured everyone was capable of finding the truth for themselves. Once I saw how easy it is to be deceived by a convincing person, I decided it would be better to state the truth and then allow people to make informed choices about how they want to address the truth.
_________________ The question of suicide: Keep it a question. It's not really an answer.
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Roo-D-Bear
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 6:27 am |
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Joined: Mon Sep 24, 2007 6:00 pm Posts: 150
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I don't believe that my T is being dishonest with me. He never has. but i am not one who likes labels and stuff so I don't ask a lot about them. Just like the DDNOS or whatever it is. I hate it because I know that people can really twist it and make you look really 'crazy' (for lack of a better term this early in the morning). I have personal reasons though why that particular diagnosis ticks me off so much. I'd rather not open that up now before I have to go to work.
I started school to become a therapist but I was not successful so I leave the learning up to my T. I do trust him. in fact, i just emailed him to ask him to clarify the complex ptsd issue up for me. just so I would know.
an example of how my T is so honest with me is that I asked if i still had borderline. he opened the book and we went through the criteria. yup, still got it. argh. LOL.
I do 'parts' work with my T and its similar I think to inner child work. I have an inner child. but these therapy models are very complex to understand and the way my T teaches me about it is very basic. I am a smart cookie, don't get me wrong. but I do have a hard time with some comprehension and when things are very technical, it frustrates me because I am lost very quickly.
I didn't have any questions today Jody about inner child. I was just agreeing with you my dear :O)
I'd like to participate more on the board here but is it possible for some of you who have been around a lot longer to try to remember (if possible) that I do have some learning disorders and reading comprehension is one. not that you have to remember that.....sorry it came out wrong. I mean, that maybe you will be sensitive to the fact that I may need to ask for it to be worded more simply or broken into a smaller sentence? maybe this is all coming out wrong. I am smart. I can read. I should stop now because I confusing myself.
looking forward to being part of the board again, Roo
_________________ Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake
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Roo-D-Bear
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 6:33 am |
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I think I got it........I think that the complex ptsd is just a extra description for a person who already has several diagnoses. Like I think my T uses it (and so I don't believe he uses it as a listed diagnosis cause insurance wouldn't pay) because I have PTSD, I have DDNOS, borderline and some other stuff like anxiety and major depression and stuff like that. so I think that its appropriate how my T uses the term.
I just googled it and found something basic and I think I understand it. my T will further explain though tomorrow i am sure..........:O ) will try to remember what he says so I can tell you all.
thanks for the understanding and patience with me! looking forward to being more active here..........I should be because I have a lot of things to still work on.
Roo
_________________ Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake
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Minx
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 8:06 am |
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Joined: Tue Nov 29, 2005 6:00 pm Posts: 633 Location: The biggest small town I've ever seen
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This stuff CAN get very complicated! And in some ways, I think it's voodoo and the doctors are still guessing.
I like the way both my pdoc and my T approach it all. A diagnosis is a good place to start, but past that, it doesn't matter much. We treat symptoms, we treat dysfunction. We work at the things that aren't healthy for me. PTSD/BPD/CPTSD/DDNOS - even certain applications of bipolar, DID and depression - There aren't any REAL tests and there aren't any FOR SURE diagnoses. There's a LOT of overlap between them all. It can help to have a clue what might be wrong, but I believe it's just a starting point.
In my recovery, I've had to spend time practicing recovery skills even when I was feeling "well" and they didn't mean a lot to me. I've found that if I practice a skill even when I don't need it, it becomes that much easier to use it when I DO need it. Mindfulness may feel like it's not that important right now, but it can be VERY helpful later on. The better you can get to it now means that it will work more effectively when it WILL help.
I can argue theory with the best of 'em, but most of the time I just let it pass. Mental health isn't something you can nail down 100%. I'd rather put my energy into doing whatever I can go become healthy and more balanced. Some people respond well to theory. That's cool.
My focus is on what I can do TODAY to react from a more centered life. My T uses all types of techniques to help me because they all work for something. Not every technique works as effectively for everything. I do get a lot of CBT/DBT work because that's most effective for managing my day to day issues. That's my foundation for TODAY, that's how I maintain my balance TODAY. Other theories and techniques work to help me sift through my past to heal my old wounds and inner scars. It's all important...but when people ask me "I feel like this, what should I do?" I'm usually going to give them a CBT-type answer because that is what usually gets me through RIGHT NOW. Then I can go over the situation later with some other tools to help me understand what the heck I was reacting to in the first place.
Go ahead and post all you want! The theory CAN be complicated and sterile and impersonal. Maybe that's not what you need right now, and that's entirely OK. Everybody here is at a different place in their recovery and what I need today is different from what you need today. This is just a group of people, like any other group of people. And you're a people too!
_________________ Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off the goal.  Chester | Join the Catster community
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Roo-D-Bear
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 8:25 am |
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Joined: Mon Sep 24, 2007 6:00 pm Posts: 150
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thanks minx! well said.
_________________ Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake
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jodyisme
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 10:48 am |
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Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm Posts: 1800 Location: texas
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((Roo)) please dont worry about asking ANYTHING. we all were new once, we all need to ask things...its cool. anyone who looks down on you for asking isnt worth messing with!
i have types of LD also...and my son does and his oldest daughter. my daughter has brain problems from her meningitus...so im quite used to all types of problems.
i dont care what my dx is, except to give me a starting point. it is my understanding the diff in ptsd vs Cptsd is chronic long term (stockholm syndrome where the person identifies with the abuser and defends him/her) vs a sudden event like say a plane crash or a murder. like, a person i knew saw his father kill himself. he has tremendous disabling ptsd. my experiences have been more over time so i have diff coping issues than he has.
regardless, what matters is to find what works for you and use it diligently, every day.
_________________ "no one can walk on you unless you lay down first" -old saying-
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Roo-D-Bear
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 12:07 pm |
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thanks jody!
I think that I have just decided that whatever my dx is/are it doesnt matter because that's not who I am. right? they help to know which direction me and my t need to go in for treatment and that's about it.
so how ya doing? good here. just getting ready for first day of school tomorrow! I am going for Medical transcription II! I am soooo excited. I should sail through it but I am still nervous. talk later.
Roo-D-Bear
_________________ Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake
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jodyisme
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 4:35 pm |
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Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm Posts: 1800 Location: texas
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((Roo)) i dont consider a dx matters except as a arrow saying...you have this and this behaviors or feelings...to guide us into how to change them. it doesnt matter much..in the long run, but as a guide. (to me anyways). it would not work to treat schizophrenia like bpd,or bipolar like say...another problem. i kinda look at it like the label,,the dx, is a general word for all my issues. everyone in the mental health field disagree on so much and always have since freud i guess. find one dr and T who works with you, find out the issues, and begin fixing them in the way works best for you. that is my belief. good luck with school! i bet you will do great!!! i will be sending you good thoughts. 
_________________ "no one can walk on you unless you lay down first" -old saying-
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Denim Blue
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 6:11 pm |
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Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm Posts: 738 Location: Reality ~ It's a great place to visit but I wouldn't want to live there!
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Roo-D-Bear wrote: I'd like to participate more on the board here but is it possible for some of you who have been around a lot longer to try to remember (if possible) that I do have some learning disorders and reading comprehension is one. not that you have to remember that.....sorry it came out wrong. I mean, that maybe you will be sensitive to the fact that I may need to ask for it to be worded more simply or broken into a smaller sentence? maybe this is all coming out wrong. I am smart. I can read. I should stop now because I confusing myself.
looking forward to being part of the board again, Roo I was not aware that you have a learning disability. I have taught Special Education and I had not seen evidence of a learning disability in your posts (your spelling is quite good) so I did not know about your reading comprehension issues. If you can be clear about what would work better for you, I can work on wording my posts differently. I tend to use my "adult" voice when I am with adults but it is easy enough for me to switch to a "teacher" voice if that would be helpful. I may not have read many of your posts in the past in order to know more about you before replying to you here. I don't tend to get involved with new members because they come and go so quickly that it is hard to keep track of them the way I can with people I have known longer. Not everyone is ready to get to work when they get here, either, but it looked like you were serious about your therapy and wanted feedback. It also looked like you were commenting on threads I started that were full of research and links to the articles for reference so I somehow felt "involved" when it might have been better for me to stay silent. It looks like you have told your therapist that you don't like labels and that could be why he is trying to use a term you are okay with instead of talking about your diagnosis using the correct DSM terms (although if you have PTSD, he would not need to use the term CPTSD - it looks like that term is only for the 8% of people who do not meet the criteria for PTSD). If he already has BPD in your chart, that may be the only label he needs to treat you. As long as your therapy is working for you, then that is what matters. I personally do not trust people who are not completely honest with me but I suppose there are times when too much information could cause a person to give up and that would not be helpful either.
_________________ The question of suicide: Keep it a question. It's not really an answer.
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Denim Blue
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Post subject: Re: very discouraged Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 7:06 pm |
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Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm Posts: 738 Location: Reality ~ It's a great place to visit but I wouldn't want to live there!
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Roo, it looks like you have enough support here already so I am going to let those who know you better respond to your posts and I will back out now. I need to use my computer time more wisely (now that I have the ability to get back to work) and get things sold rather than to put so much energy into mental health issues right now. After doing a search of your posts I now understand why you are having such a hard time understanding the research I shared and I don't think there is anything I can do to help your understanding at this time. I have discovered that people basically hear what they want to hear and there is nothing I can do to change that fact of life. I probably won't be able to tell you what you want to hear while other people will do that for you since they are wanting to hear the same things in return. Take care!
_________________ The question of suicide: Keep it a question. It's not really an answer.
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