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Jovie
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Post subject: Setting goals Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 9:19 pm |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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I dont know where this should go, so feel free to move it I am graduating college in a few weeks and have NO idea what I want to do. I don't understand people when they keep asking me what I want to do because I can't think of one thing I'd want to do. Thats so sad isn't it  But seriously... my lack of goals and self-insight is THAT bad. How on earth do I fix this? :\
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2012 5:50 am |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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Jovie,
Have you had any discssions with couselors at school about possible career options in any particular area? What is your particular area of concentration? What do you WANT to do?
I was a history major....not because I actually wanted to teach or do anything with the degree....I just loved history...still do. I simply loved my courses...all of them, even the math. I was in my 30's when I started college, and for me the whole college experience was wonderful.
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Mask
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2012 12:08 pm |
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Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2012 6:20 pm Posts: 336
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Hi Jovie,
I'm about to graduate from college as well... and with an English degree. I have no idea what I'm going to do for a job, either.
Maybe one of your goals should be thinking about some careers you would be interested in? As Dagwood suggested, a lot of colleges have career counselors available... they might be able to help point you in the right direction. At my university, we also have resume workshops, which might be something else to look into.
For me, I plan to do a bit of soul searching after college, but I'm lucky enough to be living with my parents for a while.
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Jovie
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2012 1:38 pm |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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I have no idea what I would like to do, that's the problem. I've taken career tests and they said I would be good at photography and some other careers, but I'm unable to imagine if I would enjoy doing them for a career. It's hard to explain. I want to be a writer, but I need to know what to do for my day job so to speak. Why are we with bpd so uncertain about goals??
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Mask
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2012 2:04 pm |
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Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2012 6:20 pm Posts: 336
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I think that tends to stem from an unstable sense of identity. It's hard to figure out what you want in life when your values and opinion of yourself are constantly changing. x_x
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Lunachick
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 12:43 pm |
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Joined: Wed Mar 14, 2012 6:48 am Posts: 421 Location: Brampton
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I've always wanted to work with handicapped children but have sabotaged myself since the age of 18. I went to one semester of college and then dropped out to put my now ex husband through university. Then my son came along and we couldn't afford to put me back in college. I became an at home mom which was very isolating. Now, I'm planning to contact the volunteer agency and see if I can volunteer with handicapped children.
I should have finished college. I should have had a rewarding career. I could have done both of those things and still married my husband after. His parents were financially supporting him so he didn't really didn't need me to do it. I dropped out because I was afraid of failure...or success.
The fact that you've completed your courses is a huge success! Your next move can be anything. You can always try something and decide you like something else better later. That degree equals freedom. You've both worked hard and earned the right to be confused about where to go next. Take a moment to be very proud of your accomplishments and reassure yourselves that you're both very competent and intelligent women. That's the here and now. What comes next is the future and the future is yours!
I have so much confidence in you both!
_________________ "I'm loved. I can't forget that or take it for granted. I'm going to be here and be taking advantage of every resource that I can find in Brampton. I WILL heal. The pain will subside. I have a future full of possibilities. I just have to fight tooth and nail to make it there."
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Jovie
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 4:51 pm |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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Mask wrote: I think that tends to stem from an unstable sense of identity. It's hard to figure out what you want in life when your values and opinion of yourself are constantly changing. x_x Thank you very much, Lunachick. I don't give myself enough credit for it sometimes 
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2012 7:21 am |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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Yes, You have a whole lot to be proud of Jovie.
dagwood
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Jovie
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Wed May 09, 2012 5:11 pm |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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Well, I have officially graduated and am trying to search for a job... I actually have a pretty good trade skill, I've been involved with horses all my life and am very knowledgeable in that area with tons of experience, I have someone interested in me working as a barn manager, but I do not think it's right for me becuase I would have ZERO STRUCTURE. I'd be left completely up to myself to determine what I would have to do and when, and how to do it and honestly, I don't think I could do that!!
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hi330n
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Wed May 09, 2012 6:51 pm |
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Joined: Sun Aug 21, 2011 10:27 am Posts: 190
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Congratulations on your graduation, Jovie! 
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Wed May 09, 2012 7:04 pm |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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Jovie,
Wouldn't you have structure in that you would have definite things you'd need to do to see that the horses were cared for properly and things in general went according to a schedule.
What was your major in college? I've forgotten if you've mentioned that already
dagwood
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shannib
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 8:54 am |
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Joined: Tue May 08, 2012 9:47 am Posts: 8
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I find this post very interesting. Congratulations to all who have completed college. I am one of those who never did and is constantly switching, needing to feel the support behind me to press on and most of the time I don't have it. I have a full time + part time job and yet I still would like to have a college degree too. I have been taking my general courses one at a time, but I have no idea what I could finish my degree with that would even matter.
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Jovie
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 9:06 am |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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dagwood - but left to myself to do those things, i think i wouldn't be able to. I'd feel kind of lost and confused and my self motivation is already very low.
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 9:07 am |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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shannib,
What are your interests.....anything that you could perhaps "translate" into a profession you would enjoy. I majored in history, and never did anything with it, but those years I was in college were the most enjoyable of my life in many ways.
dagwood
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 9:11 am |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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Jovie,
Do you feel depressed? sounds like you may be overwhelmed right now, and it's hard to really make good decisions when you're in this state.
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Jovie
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:49 pm |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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Yes I am overwhelmed with a ton of different stuff going on right now, including health problems. But I have no choice, I have to get a job asap...
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:57 pm |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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((((((((((((Jovie)))))))))))))))
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shannib
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 1:13 pm |
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Joined: Tue May 08, 2012 9:47 am Posts: 8
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Dagwood - My interests, nurturing others is a big one. Otherwise, I am also very good with math, organizational skills. I am involved in healthcare currently, so was thinking nursing, but not sure that I can emotionally handle all the crisis involved with nursing. I have to get through this time in my life, thinking just keep things at their current normal, learn how to handle my crisis events appropriately, and then think about this further.
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 1:21 pm |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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shannib,
I think you are wise to just work on what you need now, before making any decisions. But, with an aptitude in math seems like there are many ways in which to use that. Have you considered teaching? Yeah, nursing would most definitely involve remaining at a "safe" distance.....I would have a very hard time myself not getting too involved with patients, especially ones with terminal illness.
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Jovie
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 2:12 pm |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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shannib I also am good at nurturing others, I think as part of my naturally sensitive nature. I was thinking of maybe some kind of caretaking job... hmm
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Jovie
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Sun May 20, 2012 11:28 am |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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I was thinking about learning to be a massage therapist, but I already have a 4 year degree now and don't know if doing more schooling is right. I am still so lost, can't think of one thing i'd be comfortable doing, mostly becuase of my anxiety.
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Sun May 20, 2012 11:37 am |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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Jovie, do you take any meds for the anxiety?
dagwood
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Sun May 20, 2012 12:07 pm |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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What is necessary to become a massage therapist; do you need anatomy and physiology background for it?
dagwood
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Jovie
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Sun May 20, 2012 12:21 pm |
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Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:08 am Posts: 28
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I have tried sooo many meds, they all just give me very bad side effects or don't work at all. I don' tknow why, that's just how my body is. To become a massage therapist I would just need 12-15 months of schooling at a massage therapy school. I think I would be good at it, I am just so indecisive it's bizarre. It's like I completely lack that "aha!" feeling people get when they know a decision is definitely right or wrong!
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dagwood
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Post subject: Re: Setting goals Posted: Sun May 20, 2012 12:37 pm |
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm Posts: 819 Location: sarasota
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Jovie,
How did you come up with the idea of doing massage therapy....have you been doing research on it?
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