BPDRecovery.com: Forums

Hi everyone. I have been around, but a lot has been taking my attention lately. First of all, i am in a program to go through weight loss surgery with the gastric bypass procedure. Anyway, I was all excited and feeling like this time i wouldn't be denied because of my mental health. I went last week to meet with the therapist and yesterday I went to see my T because he came back from vacation.

Anyway, the letter my T got yesterday said that I have to wait 8 more months because of my mental health. they are finding that the suicide rate in post op patients is much higher than anticipated and with my past suicidal attempts, this is not good information. so I was angry, sad, upset....you name it.

but then i was able to stop and be in the moment and think about this. they are not telling me that I can't have the surgery! this is going to help me not to focus on 'terminating' with my t because I need him for sure for at least another year. that relieved that stress i put on myself. it also gives me 8 months to attend more support groups, keep my T on board by having him go to a meeting with me and the surgical team's therapist too. and on top of that, I hope to go back to school for medical transcription! I can finish my program and get a job before the surgery! and I am going back to the pool to swim and do water aerobics. i was very happy when i did that before!

the sad thing is that i have to put off a pregnancy another 8 months and then 18 months post op. oh well. i have to stop and think about how much healthier and happier i will be to be a mommy then.

i just got an email this morning from the surgical team nurse. she said that she will ask the T that I met with if she can make an appointment for me and my T in a few months to see how things are moving along! that would make me feel so good.

but here's the rules........I have to refrain from bingeing and purging for 8 more months, i have to refrain from cutting and suicidal behaviors for another 8 months and try to get in exercising and work with my T on all this stuff. its huge. but I have been longer than 8 months since my last suicide behavior! its been a few years so that shouldn't be hard. I had gone a year without cutting and bingeing but then in the spring I dissociated around trauma stuff and cut. I also binged in the spring once. so that threw me off track and i have ot have a year free of this stuff or more before i can have surgery.

sorry this was so long. had a lot to get out. just wanted to fill you all in on what's going on and i do and wil continue to need support wherever I can get it from. the more the better! the therapist was impressed though with the work i Have done already with my own t and groups like DBT and doing EMDR and stuff like that. so they aren't negating the work i Have already done! that's great news.

well I am off to work for 2 hours and then I will post later on to let you all know if the state (vocational rehab) is going to pay for me to go back to school! i have to call today to find out! I have good feelings about this!

have a great day. miss chatting with you all!

Roo

(((Roo))),

It is so nice to hear from you again. You seem to be handling the disappointing news of the delay in your surgery realistically and logically. There are always pros and cons in any situation, and you've chosen to concentrate on the pros: more time in therapy, time to pursue a career, time to swim and get healthier before the surgery. I think the "rules" will be do-able for you since you have a goal now--the surgery. Good luck with getting the state to pay for your schooling.

miss you too ((Roo)) your doing great!

Roo, you seem to be handling things so well! I'm proud of you. If you've read any of my posts, you will see that I was supposed to have implants in 3 months. But one of the posts got infected so now I have to wait another 3 months for a new post to be put in, then another 3 months for the bone to grow around the post. That means I won't have "real teeth" for another 6 months. So I can relate to having to wait for something you want real bad.

I had to Radically Accept what happened. It wasn't anyone's fault. So I'm also left waiting. What can I say? It is what it is. And think of how healthy, both mentally and physically, you'll be when you try to get pregnant. It's really a win-win situation all around.

So now you have a real goal to work towards. I'm hoping the best for you!

aw thanks guys!

My T said I should take the lemons and turn them into lemonade and he is right! that's what I decided to do and today the RN from the surgery center emailed me and said that I could get an appointment with their therapist again for an update in November! I am so excited because I have asked my T to go with me. I think he will.

It just frustrates me that my mental health follows me around like it does. I do get their reasoning and I appreciate them looking out for me. I just didn't see it that way at first.

wish I wasn't borderline but then again, i have learned a lot of skills that others have never heard of! LOL. it can only help me out!

Roo